Funny Friday

"If you can't get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance."

George B Shaw

Guided by the Spirit

My heart overflows with a pleasing theme; I address my verses to the king; my tongue is like the pen of a ready scribe. -Psalm 45:1


The psalmist's tongue was guided by the Spirit of God, as the pen is by the hand of a ready writer. Oh how I long for my tongue to be Spirit guided.

Tuesday's Quotes

"Who ever thought up the word "Mammogram"? Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone?"

You can’t lose me

As I watch dear friends send their babies off to college, I’ve been surveying deep into the ‘ol memory vaults of my own children and I’m struck to an even greater level with how precious and fleeting our time with our children is.

I read a blog post the other day and it so inspired me. I can’t find her again but below are a few excerpts of her thoughts. I added and deleted and personalized. I know this is a no-no in the blogosphere of political correctness but alas I lost her name. I hope she somehow runs across this to see how she inspired me and that her story is so similar to a mom’s heart globally, that all of us moms need only tweak a few words and change the photos and our stories are basically the same!

From the moment I became a mother, I’ve been charged with protecting my children.
I removed all objects from the crib. Put them to sleep on their back instead of their stomach. I scheduled immunizations. Safety latches were installed on kitchen cabinets and all cleaning supplies found a new home up high. I plugged all the outlets with covers, put gates around areas that seemed unsafe, and installed locks on all the windows. For years my children didn’t swim at the pool without my watchful eye. Even bath time included my watchful eye. I cut their food into minuscule pieces and distributed daily vitamins. When it rained at a soccer game or school picnic, I wrapped my arms around tiny shoulders, absorbing the cold so they didn’t suffer.

Though the bus stop is only past the end of the driveway (this is the first year my son has ever even taken the bus) I watch out the window, because you never know when a predator could be lurking.

I advocated with teachers, volunteered in the classroom, sent them to school with healthy lunches and surprised them with impromptu lunch dates in the school cafeteria. Dental checkups and physicals were scheduled every six months and twelve months, respectively. I reviewed homework, enforced a decent bed time, applied Neosporin, took temperatures with a cheek and thermometer, shared difficult conversations about sex and drug use. I purchased safety equipment when they began their adventures of snowboarding, long boarding, bike riding, and climbing the 25 foot trees in the park.

In spite of rolling eyes, I initiated discussions on integrity, choosing friends carefully and the importance of hard work. At times I doled out consequences in an effort to protect them from future consequences far worse than a day or two without Xbox. I taught them to drive, to setup a tent, to start a fire, to make a bed, scramble eggs, pick up after themselves, slice an apple without slicing their fingers, write thank you notes, say “I love you” even when angry, and to share their toys.

I tried to make sure they would have a good sense of humor by occasionally packing random items like dog biscuits in their lunches, sticking rocks in the foot of their bed for a bedtime surprise, short sheeting them, throwing food on them or dousing them with cold water in the shower. Much to my chagrin they have learned this skill well. They are stronger, faster and smarter than me now and I am climbing into bed only to find strange objects and well THEY HAVE LEARNED WELL!

I have made sure to teach them the importance of prayer and relationship with their heavenly Father, to have devotional time and to learn to find Him on their own. To treat others as they wish to be treated.


For a long time it’s been my job to protect my children, to buy them time to grow up and learn how to thrive on their own. This is what has consumed my life for more than a decade and heading towards two decades. This is what I dreamed of before I held my first born and then my second born in my arms. And this is what makes my next chapter of mothering the most difficult part:

“Letting go, the final frontier of their childhood. These are the voyages of the mother’s heart. Her 18+year mission: to prepare and free her children to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before” Ha thanks Captain James T. Kirk
I was watching this video this morning and in closing wanted to add these words:

"You can't lose me
"Bet your life
"I am here and I will always be
"Just a wish away
"Wherever you go
"No matter how far
"My love is where you are
"You won't be lost if you believe
"You can't lose me"


YOUCANTLOSEME

1,000 Word Thursday

Endurance

Hebrews 12:1-3

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.


Acts 20:24
However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.

Funny Friday

Blonde in a snow storm
A blonde gets lost in her car in a snowstorm. She remembers her father's advice, "If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, wait for a snow plow and follow it." Soon a snow plow comes by, and she follows it for about 45 minutes.

Finally, the driver of the truck gets out and asks her what she is doing. She explains the advice her father had given her. The driver says, "Well, I'm done with the parking lot here at the mall, now you can follow me over to the bank."

1,000 Word Thursday

Senior Moment

This is supposedly a true log recorded in the Police log of Sarasota, Florida

An elderly old lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle.She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs,"I have a gun and I know how to use it!Get out of my car!!"

The four men did'nt wait for a second threat.They got out and ran like mad.The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat.She was so shaken that she could'nt get her key into the ignition.She tried and tried and then she realised why.It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a frisbee and 2-packs of beer in the front seat.

(Insert: This story made me laugh until I fell on the floor because I have done this. Um not with a gun and not with four men, however I did begin to drive off in a van that was not mine with a child in a car seat that was not mine...more later)
A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces further down.She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake.

The sergeant to whom she she told the story could'nt stop laughing.He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a cat jacking by a mad,elderly lady described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair and carrying a large hand gun.
No charges were filed.
Moral of the story?
If you are going to have a senior moment...... make it memorable

(More on insert: True story, I was at school a few years ago dropping my oldest off and walking her to class, came back out to drive off in "MY" van and wondered why there was this terrified child in the back with eyes bugging out. I'm a little slow on the uptake and it wasn't until I noticed a van full of items that were not mine until I remember my mistake.)

Born Again

I was recently talking with a friend about an awesome song by Third Day called Born Again.




We were discussing the lyrics (look them up) LYRICS about what it was like when we first came to meet or realize the savior of our soul.
Do you remember that first encounter? The First Time?

How settling to know that though we may be broken beyond repair, He is the Master Repairman. Our El Shaddai, Yahweh, Adonai and Elohim!

Oh this song is such a good reminder to NEVER ever forget our First Love, The Lover of our soul who is jealous for us, who died for us and set us free.

To NEVER forget He has taken us from the miry clay and set our feet upon a Rock.

To never forget our first encounter with Him, or the first time He healed us, or the first time we heard His voice, OR the first time we felt His Holy Spirit and the hairs on the back of our neck bristled.

I don't want to forget the deep intense yearnings that cry out from my every pore, or the EXTRAVAGANT tenderness that He covers me with.

I DON’T WANT TO EVER FORGET THE VERY FIRST TIME I FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM.