How do we love in the difficult places

Wednesday's Word
♥
With Valentines day behind  I find myself still beset with thoughts of
 

  Love... Twu Wuv

As I wrote abstractly to what true love birthed in maturity looks like here...

 "A gritty and grainy kind of love" 

...This is more of a "HOW TO"  through the grit and grain that rubs our relationship raw like sandpaper on weathered lumber. (which if you think on it is a good thing as the wood becomes fresh and like new)

When our flesh is weary, our patience spent, and our creativity exhausted. When illness draws out, when the "grass seems greener", when temptation threatens to take over. When we allow disregard, routine or boredom open us to flattery outside our marriage. When diapers pile and bathtubs are grey and work calls out. When angry words that grip our memory cause our flesh to recoil at his touch and our heart to chill. When the paycheck doesn't meet the bills and when in laws get in the way. When we can't agree on how to parent and discipline...

These "whens" pile up like unfolded laundry.

Often it's not even in storms but a calm harbor and sunny skies where we find ourselves distracted and vulnerable. In fact I believe with all my heart that it's in the daily life of the mundane and oftentimes seemingly unrewarding tasks, that tempt us to lose perspective of who we now are in Christ as a woman and as a couple.

How do we love in the difficult places?

For me,  it all comes under the heading of this one simple phrase:

Crucify"Self"
Galations 2:20

In other words...deny myself.

It's a simple awareness and admission of my "self" tendencies. Carry this discernment into a life like a finely etched mirror. For each of us the list will vary but overall we are fairly similar. If we glance now and again into this mirror of discernment we can see where we might need some momentum.

These that fall under the Heading of Cruicfy, for me!

• Patient tounge
• Responding with I'm sorry first
• Saying thank you
• Flirt with him when all I want to do is slop in sweats and unshaven legs
• Following his leadership when every cell in my body screams to BE IN CHARGE
• Not inviting or entertaining flattery from any other man than my husband. This grows ego...ego chokes out areas where God does His deepest work. Denying ungodly and worldly desires!
• Forgiving even when not asked for or deserved
• Putting his needs first when all I prefer in the moment is me Me ME!
• Paying attention to my motives and not manipulating for my own personal gain.
• Humility (I struggle with this one) I am a pround independant woman. I'm constantly asking the Lord to crucify this area.
• Making love with Him even though I risk falling asleep, because He needs me.
• Building him up even when I may be thinking...you have got to be kidding me.
• Being his help mate, not bully factor . Words come quick and sharp. I can cut him to shreds before he blinks. (I also loathe this seed in me and thankfully with age this has mellowed.)
• Spontaneity
• Grace
• Grace
• Grace!!!

These are but a few of my "how toos" I embrace...(work at). I surely haven't arrived.
 Anticipating a mature gritty and eternal love with my best friend and husband!

"If anyone wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me."

~photo via pintrest~

BE...

Tuesday's Quotes

~ pintrest photo~

Tea for two

♥

I listen intently about her grandmother, a farmers wife over steaming cups of tea. Days that started and ended in the dark with long hard labor. How meals were small but plenty.


Our little tea cake sandwiches take her memories of tea with her grandmother. Who was not prone to fancy, preferring the earth in her hands. I study distant memories flickering in her eyes by candle light.

My sweet Betty is 80 years wise now. Her back nor fingers quite as straight, her eyes however are soft with love and compassion but not without the twinkle of humor and firm convictions.

She has held me up so many times as I've cried on her shoulder, held my hand as I questioned those 80 years of wisdom. Her prayers reach tall to the heavens and I can almost feel the flitting of angels wings while she prays. She did not birth me but I look to her as mother. The only mother I've known.
During this month of illness and the unknown she stands with me firm and unwavering.

#324

My sweet Mother in law, mother and friend Betty!

Some days you just need to

Funny Friday
Some days we just need mindless, silly words and a picture of a black belt Heifer. At least I do!

-Gentle Thoughts for Today -

• Birds of a feather flock together . . . .and then crap on your car.

• A penny saved is a government oversight.

• The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

• The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

•  Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.

• If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

• Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs...'

• Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

• Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

• When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Calculus.

• You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

• One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

• Lord, Keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth . . .. . . . .

 

AMEN!

Sadie Hawkins

1,000 Word Thursday

Best Friends

Whitney Elizabeth Houston

Whitney Elizabeth  Houston
1963-2012
Born into greatness, daughter of gospel singer Cissy Houston. More than 55 million records sold in the US alone.
Best selling artists that spanned more than a decade. I'm so sad that she was unable to conquer her addictions. I can't believe she is gone at a young 48! She was a beautiful soul. Pray for her Dtr.
This is how I will always will remember you.

Merry Christmas...Happy Birthday...Happy Easter! A card for every occasion.

I decided to be prepared and bought my Valentines Day cards early. I put them in a special place where noone could get a sneak peek. After the kiddos were off to bed, the hubby gone for work and the house still, I gleefully grabbed my pen and....wait, where are the cards? I cannot even believe it, I've spent the last hour and a half looking for those perfect expressions of my love and they are nowhere to be found.

I love my family and thankfully they are painfully used to my misplacement of items, namely cards. The cards they will receive tomorrow will be the birthday, Christmas and other holidays gone by, that were lost at one time as well. Oh dear...it's fun to repurpose a birthday card into much more...right :)

I love the way these scrumptions cupcakes look but even more the heart behind them.
When I asked my daughter why she was making so many and who she was going to give them to she told me this...
"Mom I'm just going to give them to whoever is supposed to have them. I hate to see people left out, and so many other kids at school are getting Valentines from boyfriends or girlfriends. I just want to see people smile and feel loved".
Ahhh I feel full!

Let's see the next holiday is Easter...I do believe my family very well may be receiving Valentine cards!

MY ♥